I'd like to
respond to robert's "mental exercize" question. I have
about 78 "arguments" for creationism:
1 TRANSCENDENTAL ARGUMENT (1) Creation is true. (2) If
Creation is true, then reason must exist. (3) Reason
exists. (4) Therefore, Creation is true.
2. COSMOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (1) If I say something must
have a cause, it has a cause. (2) I say the universe must
have a cause. (3) Therefore, the universe has a cause. (4)
Therefore, Creation is true.
3. ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (a) (1) I define God to be X.
(2) Since I can conceive of X, X must exist. (3) Therefore,
Creation is true.
4. ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (b) (1) Creation is true. (2)
Since Creation is true, God must be perfect. (3) That which
is perfect must exist. (4) Therefore, Creation is true.
5. MODAL ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (1) Creation is true. (2)
God, existing, is either necessary or unnecessary. (3) God
is not unnecessary, therefore God must be necessary. (4)
Therefore, Creation is true.
6. TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (1) Check out that tree. Isn't
it pretty? (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
7. ARGUMENT FROM MIRACLES (1) My aunt Helen was most
likely to die from cancer. (2) She didn't. (3) Therefore,
Creation is true.
8. MORAL ARGUMENT (a) (1) Person X, a well-known
atheist, was morally inferior to the rest of us. (2)
Therefore, Creation is true.
9. MORAL ARGUMENT (b) (1) In my younger days I was a
cursing, drinking, smoking, gambling, child-molesting,
thieving, murdering, bed-wetting bastard. (2) That all
changed once I became religious. (3) Therefore, Creation is
true.
10. ARGUMENT FROM CREATION (1) If evolution is false,
then creationism is true, and therefore Creation is true.
(2) Evolution can't be true, since I lack the mental
capacity to understand it; moreover, to accept its truth
would cause me to be uncomfortable (3) Therefore, Creation
is true.
11. ARGUMENT FROM FEAR (1) If there is no God then we're
all going to die. (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
12. ARGUMENT FROM THE BIBLE (1) [arbitrary passage from
OT] (2) [arbitrary passage from NT] (3) Therefore, Creation
is true.
13. ARGUMENT FROM INTELLIGENCE (1) Look, there's really
no point in me trying to explain the whole thing to you
stupid atheists -- it's too complicated for you to
understand. Creation is true whether you like it or not.
(2) Therefore, Creation is true.
14. ARGUMENT FROM UNINTELLIGENCE (1) Okay, I don't
pretend to be as intelligent as you guys -- you're
obviously very well read. But I read the Bible, and nothing
you say can convince me that God does not exist. I feel him
in my heart, and you can feel him too, if you'll just ask
him into your life. "For God so loved the world that he
sent his only begotten son into the world, that whosoever
believes in him shall not perish from the earth" John 3:16.
(2) Therefore, Creation is true.
15. ARGUMENT FROM BELIEF (1) If Creation is true, then I
should believe in Him. (2) I believe in God. (3) Therefore,
Creation is true.
16. ARGUMENT FROM INTIMIDATION (1) See this bonfire? (2)
Therefore, Creation is true.
17. PARENTAL ARGUMENT (1) My mommy and daddy told me
that Creation is true. (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
18. ARGUMENT FROM NUMBERS (1) Millions and millions of
people believe in God. (2) They can't all be wrong, can
they? (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
19. ARGUMENT FROM ABSURDITY (1) Maranathra! (2)
Therefore, Creation is true.
20. ARGUMENT FROM ECONOMY (1) Creation is true, you
bastards! (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
21. BOATWRIGHT'S ARGUMENT (1) Ha ha ha. (2) Therefore,
Creation is true.
22. DORE'S ARGUMENT (1) I forgot to take my meds. (2)
Therefore, I AM CHRIST!! (3) Therefore, Creation is
true.
23. ARGUMENT FROM GUITAR MASTERY (1) Eric Clapton is
God. (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
24. ARGUMENT FROM INTERNET AUTHORITY (1) There is a
website that successfully argues for the existence of God.
(2) Here is the URL. (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
25. ARGUMENT FROM INCOMPREHENSIBILITY (1) Flabble glurk
zoom boink blubba snurgleschnortz ping! (2) No one has ever
refuted (1). (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
26. ARGUMENT FROM AMERICAN EVANGELISM (1) Telling people
that Creation is true makes me filthy rich. (2) Therefore,
Creation is true.
27. MITCHELL'S ARGUMENT (1) The Christian Creation is
true. (2) Therefore, all worldviews which don't assume the
Christian God's existence are false and incomprehensible.
(3) Therefore, Creation is true.
28. ARGUMENT FROM BLINDNESS (a) (1) Atheists are
spiritually blind. (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
29. ARGUMENT FROM BLINDNESS (b) (1) God is love. (2)
Love is blind. (3) Ray Charles is blind. (4) Therefore, Ray
Charles is God. (5) Therefore, Creation is true.
30. ARGUMENT FROM FALLIBILITY (1) Human reasoning is
inherently flawed. (2) Therefore, there is no reasonable
way to challenge a proposition. (3) I propose that Creation
is true. (4) Therefore, Creation is true.
31. ARGUMENT FROM SMUGNESS (1) Creation is true. (2) I
don't give a crap whether you believe it or not; I have
better things to do than to try to convince you morons. (3)
Therefore, Creation is true.
32. ARGUMENT FROM META-SMUGNESS (1) [obscenity deleted]
(2) Therefore, Creation is true.
33. ARGUMENT FROM MANIFESTATIONS (1) If you turn your
head sideways and squint a little, you can see an image of
a bearded face in that tortilla. (2) Therefore, Creation is
true.
34. SLATHER'S ARGUMENT (1) My toaster is God. (2)
Therefore, Creation is true.
35. ARGUMENT FROM INCOMPLETE DEVASTATION (1) A plane
crashed killing 143 passengers and crew. (2) But one child
survived with only third-degree burns. (3) Therefore,
Creation is true.
36. ARGUMENT FROM POSSIBLE WORLDS (1) If things had been
different, then things would be different. (2) That would
be bad. (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
37. ARGUMENT FROM SHEER WILL (1) I DO believe in God! I
DO believe in God! I do I do I do I DO believe in God! (2)
Therefore, Creation is true.
38. ARGUMENT FROM NONBELIEF (1) The majority of the
world's population are nonbelievers in Christianity. (2)
This is just what Satan intended. (3) Therefore, Creation
is true.
39. ARGUMENT FROM POST-DEATH EXPERIENCE (1) Person X
died an atheist. (2) He now realizes his mistake. (3)
Therefore, Creation is true.
40. ARGUMENT FROM EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL (1) God loves you.
(2) How could you be so heartless to not believe in him?
(3) Therefore, Creation is true.
41. ARGUMENT FROM INCOHERENT BABBLE (1) See that person
spazzing on the church floor babbling incoherently? (2)
That's how infinite wisdom reveals itself. (3) Therefore,
Creation is true.
42. OPRAH'S ARGUMENT (a) (1) The human spirit exists.
(2) Therefore, Creation is true.
43. OPRAH'S ARGUMENT (b) (1) Check out this video
segment. (2) Now how can anyone watch that and NOT believe
in God? (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
44. CALVINISTIC ARGUMENT (1) If Creation is true, then
he will let me watch you be tortured forever. (2) I rather
like that idea. (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
45. ARGUMENT FROM CROCKERY (1) Pots don't go around
giving orders to the potter. (2) Therefore, Creation is
true.
46. ARGUMENT FROM MASS PRODUCTION (1) Barbie dolls were
created. (2) If Barbie dolls were created, then so were
trees. (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
47. ARGUMENT FROM PAROCHIALISM (1) God is everywhere.
(2) We haven't been everywhere to prove he's not there. (3)
Therefore, Creation is true.
48. ARGUMENT FROM UPPERCASE ASSERTION (1) CREATION IS
TRUE! GET USED TO IT! (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
49. ARGUMENT FROM INFINITE REGRESS (1) Ask atheists what
caused the Big Bang. (2) Regardless of their answer, ask
how they know this. (3) Continue process until the atheist
admits he doesn't know the answer to one of your questions.
(4) You win! (5) Therefore, Creation is true.
50. ARGUMENT FROM INCREDULITY (1) How could God NOT
exist, you bozo? (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
51. ARGUMENT FROM HISTORY (1) The Bible is true. (2)
Therefore, the Bible is historical fact. (3) Therefore,
Creation is true.
52. ARGUMENT FROM RESURRECTION (1) Proof of God's
existence will be available when you rise bodily from your
grave. (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
53. ARGUMENT FROM BIOGENESIS (1) Where did Adam come
from, dummy? (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
54. ARGUMENT FROM STEADFAST FAITH (1) A lot of really
cool people believed in God their entire lives. (2)
Therefore, Creation is true.
55. ARGUMENT FROM LONELINESS (1) Christians say that
Jesus is their best friend. (2) I'm lonely, and I want a
best friend. (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
56. ARGUMENT FROM ARGUMENTATION (1) Creation is true.
(2) [atheist's counterargument] (3) Yes he does. (4)
[atheist's counterargument] (5) Yes he does! (6) [atheist's
counterargument] (7) YES HE DOES!!! (8) [atheist gives up
and goes home] (9) Therefore, Creation is true.
57. ARGUMENT FROM CREATIVE INTERPRETATION (1) God is:
(a) The feeling you have when you look at a newborn baby.
(b) The love of a mother for her child. (c) That little
still voice in your heart. (d) Humankind's potential to
overcome their difficulties. (e) How I feel when I look at
a sunset. (f) The taste of ice cream on a hot day. (2)
Therefore, Creation is true.
58. ARGUMENT FROM INSECURITY (1) We have gone to
absolutely berserk lengths to establish that atheists are
laughable morons. (1.5) Actually, we did so in the hopes of
curing our own insecurities about theism -- but there's no
chance in hell we'll ever admit that. (2) Therefore,
atheists are laughable morons. (3) Therefore, Creation is
true.
59. ARGUMENT FROM SUPERIORITY (1) If God does not exist,
then I am an inferior being, since I am not "special" in a
cosmic sense. (2) But I am superior. Because I am a
Christian. (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
60. ARGUMENT FROM PERFECTION (1) If there are absolute
moral standards, then Creation is true. (2) Atheists say
that there are no absolute moral standards. (3) But that's
because they don't want to admit to being sinners. (4)
Therefore, there are absolute moral standards. (5)
Therefore, Creation is true.
61. ARGUMENT FROM HUMAN NECESSITY (1) Atheists say that
they don't need God. (2) Which just goes to show that they
need God. (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
62. ARGUMENT FROM HIDDEN LOGIC (a) (1) Intellectually, I
know that the existence of God is impossible, or vastly
improbable. (2) But I must put on the appearance of being
cool and intellectual in front of my Christian apologist
peers. (3) Therefore, I must pretend that (1) is false. (4)
Therefore, Creation is true.
63. ARGUMENT FROM INDULGENCE (1) Atheists like to think
that they can control their emotional desires. (2) But
they're atheists, so they can't. (3) Therefore, atheists
feel the need to indulge in whatever they feel like without
worrying about committing sin. (4) This just goes to show
how they need God in their lives. (5) Therefore, Creation
is true.
64. ARGUMENT FROM HATE (1) Some atheists hate Christians
and Christianity. (2) That's why they don't believe in God.
(3) Pathetic, aren't they? (4) Therefore, Creation is
true.
65. ARGUMENT FROM QUENTIN SMITH (1) Quentin Smith says
that God does not exist. (2) But God does exist. (3)
Therefore, Quentin Smith cannot be accepted as an expert on
the matter, because he is wrong. (4) Therefore, Creation is
true.
66. ARGUMENT FROM EVIL SPIRITS (1) I've just had contact
with evil spirits. (2) Therefore, Creation is true.
67. ARGUMENT FROM HIDDEN LOGIC (b) (1) Atheists say that
God doesn't exist. (2) But they only say that because they
want to look cool and intellectual in front of their peers.
(3) They don't fool me! (4) Therefore, Creation is
true.
68. ARGUMENT FROM HOVIND'S CHALLENGE (1) Kent Hovind
offers $250,000 (which may or may not exist) to anyone who
can demonstrate evolution (defined as a natural, acausal
origin of the universe) to a reasonable doubt (meaning with
100% certainty, allowing for no other possibilities
whatsoever) in front of a neutral committee (handpicked by
Hovind himself) and according to certain criteria
(carefully worded so as to rule out any possibility
whatsoever of the challenge ever being met). (2) No atheist
has ever met this challenge. (3)Therefore, Creation is
true.
69. ARGUMENT FROM INSANITY (1) No sane person could have
thought up Christianity (2) Therefore, it must be true (3)
Therefore, Creation is true
70 ARGUMENT FROM EXHAUSTION (abridged) (1) Do you agree
with the utterly trivial proposition X? (2) Atheist: of
course. (3) How about the slightly modified proposition X'?
(4) Atheist: Um, no, not really. (5) Good. Since we agree,
how about Y? Is that true? (6) Atheist: No! And I didn't
agree with X'! (7) With the truths of these clearly
established, surely you agree that Z is true as well? (8)
Atheist: No. So far I have only agreed with X! Where is
this going, anyway? (9) I'm glad we all agree..... ....
(37) So now we have used propositions X, X', Y, Y', Z, Z',
P, P', Q and Q' to arrive at the obviously valid point R.
Agreed? (38) Atheist: Like I said, so far I've only agreed
with X. Where is this going? .... (81) So we now conclude
from this that propositions L'', L''' and J'' are true.
Agreed? (82) I HAVEN'T AGREED WITH ANYTHING YOU'VE SAID
SINCE X! WHERE IS THIS GOING!? .... (177) ...and it follows
that proposition HRV, SHQ'' and BTU' are all obviously
valid. Agreed? (178) [Atheist either faints from overwork
or leaves in disgust] (179) Therefore, Creation is
true.
71. MR. GOODSALT'S ARGUMENT (ARGUMENT FROM GENERAL
INQUIRY) (1) Question for atheist population: [apparently
random question] (2) Your answer is wrong. (3) Therefore,
Creation is true.
72. PEACOCK ARGUMENT FROM ORIGINALITY (1) I have written
the following to demonstrate the existence of God. (2)
[insert entire text of a William Lane Craig article] (3)
Therefore, Creation is true.
73. PEACOCK ARGUMENT FROM LIMITED VOCABULARY (1) You use
lots of big words. (2) Therefore, I cannot possibly be
expected to understand your refutation of my position. (3)
Therefore, Creation is true.
74. PEACOCK ARGUMENT FROM SELECTIVE MEMORY (1)
[Christian asks "stumper" question] (2) [Atheist answers
question] (3) [A lapse of time] (4) [Christian repeats
question] (5) [Atheist repeats answer] (6) [A lapse of
time] (7) [Christian repeats question] (8) [Atheist repeats
answer] (9) [A lapse of time] (10) Atheist, you never
answered my question. (11) Therefore, Creation is true.
75. ARGUMENT FROM HISTORICAL CORRELATION (1) This
historical event was recorded. (2) The Bible mentions this
event. (3) Therefore, Creation is true.
76. THE CLASSICAL CIRCULAR ARGUMENT (1) We know that
Creation is true because the Bible tells us so. (2) We know
that the Bible is true because it is the word of God (3)
Therefore, Creation is true.
77. ARGUMENT FROM SELECTIVE CELEBRITY QUOTATION (1)
[insert famous persons name] is a well known Atheist. (2)
[insert famous persons name] made a comment about God. (3)
Therefore, Creation is true.
78. ARGUMENT FROM IRRELEVANT TRIVIA (1) The Bible was
written over a period of 1500 years. (2) Many people from
varied backgrounds wrote the Bible. (3) Lots of copies of
the Bible have been sold (4) Therefore, Creation is true.
(This is a modification of the 78 "therefore god exists"
arguments)